You’re Better Than You Think You Are

I was a lowly white belt at the time, rolling with a seasoned veteran who had just earned his brown, and he was having his way with me on the jiu jitsu mat. We had been going at it (not that way, you perverts) when at one point, he abruptly stopped me to make a point.

“Hook, I can feel you when you have an opportunity to make a move, and you hesitate, don’t pull the trigger, then the opportunity is gone by the time you go for it. That’s never going to work for you”

I responded back with some random jabber along the lines that it was futile, because he was so much better than me, that these moves wouldn’t ever succeed. This really got him irate.

“No, your wrong. You’re instincts are right, and you should be going for those moves. That fact that you’re thinking in such direction is a sign that your heads in the right place…”

Then he dropped this bomb.

Trust instincts and go for a bold move. Doubting your abilities keep you from trying an aggressive moves. Those moves, though they may not work at the time, are what one day will win you matches. You’re better than you think you are.

Cue my mind being blow.

I’ve been thinking long and hard about this speech I received years ago. At a time, I was training at Jiu Jitsu 2-4 times a week training for a competition (I got 3rd for the white belts. It was pretty dope, I still have the metal :)) This is heavily applicable to my game now, as where I stand, I have a 3 girl rotation. I no longer need sex, as I’m getting laid more than I actually would desire (few things can get between a girl and the already accepted D she is craving). More quantity is low on my list of desires.

I’m going elitist with my game(something I would only recommend once you get a full rotation) and approaching 8’s, 9’s, and 10’s exclusively.

Now, when I see a 10 waiting at the same subway stop as I am, I still can get a little psyched out. I mean I’m busy, she’s probably busy, and she’s sooo hot she MUST have some other guy yadda yadda yadda yadda.

What I realized is I was making the same mistake as that day in the Jiu Jitsu mat. When you start to get good at anything, your instincts are their, but they can blurred with doubt and thoughts of failure, particular when faced a opponent who we expect defeat as we percieve them as superior.(A brown belt, or a 10.) It’s in these moments, I take a step back, catch mind fear lying to my mind, trust my instincts, and go for it.

The last 5 perfect 10’s I approached I was nervous jumping into. I went back to the basics though, trusted my skills, and used the same opener/attract routine/ kino I’ve used girl after girl after girl, and you know what? All that material still works. They laugh, I grin, I hand them my phone, they enter their number.

I forget how good I’ve gotten at this at times, and until I try with the hottest girls in the toughest sets, I won’t know how good I am, and how great I can be.

Trust your gut and go with it gentlemen, you’re better than you think.


How do you plan on conquering the world?

I want you stop, right now, think, and write down how you plan on conquering the world.

Now, you may be confused, I don’t mean the literal usurping of nations, unless that is you’re actually goal, in which case you are actually on the path I want you. Conquering the world is a metaphor for the degree of ambition I think everyone should strive for. How will you rise to the top of the field you most care about? Establish yourself? Prove your value to society? The answer to these questions is the forefront of a man’s identity, and therefore deserves time, effort, and the ability to articulate such to hot babes who a craving Mr. McDreamy to sweep them off their feet. Define your world (the arts, politics, business, philanthropy) and conquer it (Make a real difference. Do the most good)

Who are the men who have successfully conquered the world? Think leading actors, tech billionaires, the president, rock stars, real estate moguls, and a variety of people who, more or less, run things. These are the men who dictate the direction of nations. Its pretty obvious when someone encounters one of such men, as they have a particular aura about them. They have an ambition and charisma that others gravitate to and will follow. Be these men.

Now, you may be thinking. “How am I, a lowly (Student/delivery driver/ desk work / insert miscellaneous unglamorous job here) supposed to communicate this? I’m no celebrity, I can’t compete!” There is a dirty little trick though. You don’t have to be on top of the mountain to be able to reap the benefits of these men. The key is to be on the path to one day reach the destination you desire so much. Having the ambition, and having a tangible PLAN with ACTIONS in motion you are actively taking to reach this is all that is required.

A few years back, I was working as a waiter, a very unglamorous job. However, there was clear intent to it. I wanted to be a musician.  I had had a corporate job prior, which took me out of town sometimes, and sucked up much of my time. The deeper I got involved with the the band, I realized my corporate job kept me from diving full in. I quit it when they tried to promote me (true story) and got a gig in a restaurant that just opened. Beautiful thing about the restaurant job drop shift at the tip of a hat if a gig came to be, and disappear for weeks at a time if I wanted to tour. It was also a job that wouldn’t occupy my mind when I clocked out. I could go strait to writing music. Better yet, I met a young audio engineering at the restaurant who recorded my first album on the cheap. He also helped put together a festival he looped my band into after the whole project.

I scored some of the finest women in my life working in the restaurant. Some of which made wayyyyy more money than me and had far more impressive job titles. Why did they get involved with the lowly burger joint worker? I was ALL IN on my dream of playing music. I had made pretty significant changes consistent with such. Other could TANGIBLY EXPERIENCE me chasing my dream by coming to one of our shows. I wanted to conquer the musical world, and I was trying as clearly and intentionally as I could.

Music was just my personal case at that point in my life (If I ever meet you in person, I’ll give ya the evolution of the plan 😉 ) . A blog you commit yourself to to improve ones writing.  The improv troup you’re part of to pursue that dream of comedic acting. Have a BIG goal,  and take TANGIBLE and DESCRIBABLE steps towards reaching it. Then weave wove that goal into the great plan and strategy of your life. The pursuit of this then will become the conversational fotter you talk about with friends, relatives, and the beautiful women you meet. If you are fully committed, people will take notice, and they will become curious.

I ask you again, how do you plan on conquering the world.

You should be able to explain in one sentence, one paragraph, and a 10 minute monologue. Make a comment below if you’re having trouble getting started. I’ll give you some ideas on how to elaborate.